INFO-GRAM

In the last blog I told you that your kids can clean their rooms.  In this post I want to search out some of the reasons why they don’t right now.

You ask, plead, cajole, bribe, threaten but do you act  like a mature adult and give consequences if it isn’t done?

Did you know that kids get an average of 70 new toys a year?  Where do all those toys go?  If you have a playroom you are fortunate, if not they are stuffed in every available crevice in your child’s room and probably in the living room, bathroom, your bedroom, the dining room and I be the kitchen has a few too.  There are just too many for Junior’s room.

I know you go in there and clean maybe once every 6 months, maybe more maybe less.  The biggest problem is that Junior has too many toys and couldn’t keep his room clean even if he wanted.  He is totally overwhelmed!!

So give him a little slack.  Get in there and purge what he doesn’t play with any more.  Throw away the broken ones.  Give away the ones that are too young for him.

Cool.  Now that he only has a couple left, I bet he can manage to clean his room.

Kids Can Clean, kids can clean without your nagging, kids can clean alone, kids can clean and do a good job, kids can clean every day, kids can clean without being yelled at or cajoled or prodded and without Parents losing their temper.

Do you think your kids can’t clean just because they don’t with you as a parent? Do you think they are not intellectually capable of understanding the word clean?

Do you know that kids get approximately 70 new toys per year?

Then what is the problem?

Did you ever teach them to clean?

Did you ever give them consequences if they didn’t clean?

Were you consistent and did you follow through?

Do you think that is all it takes?

Do you think YOU can do it?

Well they can and you can and that is the beginning of your story.

Check back next week for part 2.

http://kidsclean.biz

I just stumbled upon an awesome website for parents, teachers and kids.

It is http://www.8togreat.com

I won’t say anything else but you have to see this website.

Just what is SELF TALK?  When is it in life that we learn SELF TALK?  Does anyone sit down and teach us this important lesson?  Do we get any guidance from anyone who matters?  How important is SELF TALK?

I had an eating disorder when I was 12 years old.  I created that to deal with stresses  in my life.  I didn’t know it then but I did need a coping mechanism.  Otherwise the pain was too great to deal with.

I kept this eating disorder around for 30 years.  I did go into “In Patient Treatment” for 3 months, followed by therapy for… well I am still going back for “Tune-ups”, I am 57.

It was only 8 years ago that I stumbled upon Self Talk as a way to prevent myself from over-eating.

Self Talk pops in when I may be considering buying that candy bar.  If I continue to entertain the idea, I will be walking out of the store with the candy bar.  When my “ON PURPOSE” self talk kicks in, I can remind myself that I have a bigger goal in mind and I will walk out of the store empty handed.

So what is SelfTalk?  It is the conversation in our minds that goes on all day long, every day of our lives.  It tells us good things and bad things about ourselves, life, how people feel about us, how we feel about others, when to discipline our kids, whether we yell or whether we are patient. Whether we buy the $500.00 hand bag or whether we go with the more affordable $100.00.

We learn self talk as we grow as kids.  So where is all this going?  Watching my grandkids grow up and watching them receive discipline, I noticed that no one was teaching them about  SELF TALK . No one was explaining to them how to deal with an issue in their minds.  For example: Mom would tell them not to play with Johnny any more because Johnny was a bully. Mom did not tell them how to tell Johnny  they couldn’t play with him or  what to say to themselves when they saw Johnny.  So they might go outside and there was Johnny and they were embarrassed or ashamed and they just let him bully anyway. Haven’t you ever encountered a situation you didn’t know how to deal with?  Think about kids.  They encounter every minute of every day.

If Mom had said,” When you see Johnny, say hi Johnny, we can’t play with you anymore, Sorry.”  And then go somewhere else to play or come back in the house.”  That may be all that is needed.  So the child has some ammunition.  Sometimes you can even rehearse that with your child.

Then we get a little older and there is Johnny again.  OK Jr. has already told Johnny once.  Now he needs to remind himself that ” I still can’t play with Johnny, I will wave, say hello and go to my house to avoid any contact ( that is coached from MOM or DAD.)

Or, we are told to not go to McD’s after schoolbecause we are working on our weight.  The moment arrives, I round the corner , I see McD’s and I have to say to myself, (No, I am not supposed to go to McD’s to eat, I will go home and eat.  I will then ask MOM, when can I go to McD’s the next time because I like it so much?) Again, coached by MOM.

If Mom’s and Dad’s aren’t teaching kids what to say to themselves, then they are making it up based on their experiences. So not only what to say to the kid selling drugs on the corner, but what to say to themselves when they are about to walk past this kid, what words to use in their minds that keeps them on the straight and narrow.

Now parents, I know we have an awful lot of stuff to do in life and with our kids, so you may be saying, when will I have time for all this?

Keep this in mind, had my folks talked to me a little bit about telling myself a certain thing when I wanted to eat, I may have been able to avoid an “Eating Disorder.”

You make time for the things you WANT TO DO!!!!

All content here should be considered as opinion only. Always seek the advice of your doctor regarding your health or the health of your children.

Wow, being a mom is a lot of responsibility.  We have to teach them this, we have to teach them that.  We have to get them places on time, we have to remind them to get dressed.  How do we keep it all straight.

Somewhere along the line we have this programmed into our brains that puts us on Auto Pilot so that most of those  are automatic.  But sometimes those things don’t work out as well as we have planned.

Then we have to turn to others for the answers.

One of those  may be cleaning, kids cleaning their rooms, kids picking up after themselves.  Maybe we weren’t taught how .

So I am bringing you a workshop called KidsClean.  It will launch on September 1, 09.  I teach you how to teach your kids to clean.  I show you where to and how to put things, what to do about Laundry for instance.

And the best part is that I offer a lot of support after the class, emails, ezines, ongoing stuff that one needs to keep this till it becomes a habit for the kids as well as you.

When children help clean up after themselves they are learning important lessons about cooperation and responsibility.  They  begin to establish a healthy self esteem and your Kudos support that.

Keep your eye out for my Launch.  http://bit.ly/jLUB8  Short url for KidsClean.biz Follow me on

Twitter@KidCleanCoach

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