You gotta find one.  Ask around the office, ask your friends, ask at church.  If you don’t get any referrals that way than ask everyone you know.  Surely someone will have a cleaning lady.

The last resort is going online to Craig’s List or the local newspaper.

If you have to find one via advertisements, then you should do a background check.  Every state should have a Bureau of Investigation.  Here in Colorado it is called the CBI or Colorado Bureau of Investigation.  When I was hiring employees I got an account with them and paid $6.00 for each person I checked out, all online.

You will need full name, address, SS number.  Be right up front with the person when you first talk with them on the phone.  Tell them you will be running a background check. Ask them how they will do on that.  Most times they are honest and tell you upfront if there is anything.    Depending on what you find will depend on whether that person will be cleaning for you.

If you don’t pull a background check, ask for at least 3 previous work references.  Ask those work references several questions…

Is the person on-time?

Would you hire them back?

Do they have issues that could come between you and the job?

Do they call if they are late?

Can they get to work without a car?

Do they show up as if a job is very important to them?

Now maybe you think that all of this is more than you would prefer to put up with.

Next blog…Dealing with a national cleaning company.

• Leave the mess and live with it.
• Trade your services for one.
• Get one.

As a cleaning lady, I know first hand just how wonderful I am for my clients.  Can you imagine coming home to a clean house, all neat, everything in its place, vacuum tracks in the carpet? Now that I cannot imagine because I don’t have a cleaning lady. I do clean my own house but its not the same. Another option is to hire a cleaning lady just to get things in order and then you can maintain it.  When it gets a little raggy around the edges, call her back.  A lot of cleaning ladies will take work anywhere they can get it.  Some won’t.  Ask all of those questions when you first interview her.

This one of a 5 part series on “How to Hire a Cleaning Lady.”

In my quest to find my niche here on the blogosphere, I have decided to call my blog…”The InfoGram”  I am the gram(a) and I give you info.

The purpose of everything I do here on the internet is to make life easier for moms and dads.  Being a parent is probably the biggest challenge you will ever have AND there is no manual.  You do most by the seat of your pants.  You make mistakes and learn from them and some things come out awesome.

Most of what you do is from what was done when you were a child growing up.  The husband-same.  Hopefully the two of you have similar ideas cause that could be another challenge.

Another hopeful- you study others who are experts and put their ideas to work.  Especially when it comes to communication and, my favorite, consequences.

There are lots of savvy experts out there, write to me if you don’t know how to choose one.  Be glad to help you out.

Don’t forget the KIDSCLEAN program.  A comprehensive program teaching your kids to clean their rooms.  And check out my website and meet BUZZ, the kid’s daily reminder to do Evening Events. http://bit.ly/jLUB8

Follow me on Twitter.  I give daily hints on cleaning and organizing.

Twitter.com@SallyDouglass.

Can’t wait to see you there!!

Today I want to talk about language, language you use with your kids.  That language has a lot to do with the way kids turn out as adults.  That language molds your children into their growing up lives.  That language  predicts how they will react with others when they are adults.  Especially authority figures.

There are two types of language, REACTIVE LANGUAGE and PROACTIVE LANGUAGE.

I am sure you all have experienced REACTIVE LANGUAGE. Your 2 year old is playing happily at the shallow end of the pool, the next thing you know he has wandered over to the deep end and looks like he will jump in at any moment.  OF COURSE YOU REACT and use REACTIVE LANGUAGE!!!!=:O

Another example is your 5 year old is in Pottery Barn with you and you walk past a kitchen setting, he grabs a fake pear and is about to take a mouthwatering bite.   Who wants to take bets on the words you use, hushed so no one can hear you, to let him know that  STOP,THAT IS NOT REAL!!!=:o

Those are two examples of times that you really do not have a choice, MOM, you react and use that reactive language.

But a more subtle example could be at home, when you are stressed, you have some bills due, you are trying to get your computer to boot up, it is having a “mind of its own day” and your teen asks if you will drive her to her friends house, (clearly within walking distance) and you just blow up.  And that reaction happens to us all.  Sometimes we let it go, sometimes we apologize.  At any rate, we probably feel bad.

I did this a lot in my motherhood experience.  As a matter of fact, I did it too much and it took me a long time to change that reactive self to a thinking, proactive approach.  My daughter was already grown. I got it down really well with the grand-kids.

So I want to make a point here.  If you notice that you are a “REACTIVE” LANGUAGE PARENT, you can change it.  It takes courage, determination and conscientiousness.  OH, I also wanted to say that your kids will probably turn out ok, it is a matter of how you feel about yourself that will determine whether you will want to work on changing it.

I plan on addressing this subject more in my next blogs and going into PROACTIVE LANGUAGE and what that looks like.

MOMS,  we seem to always be striving to be better, to be a better mom, to be a better wife, to be a better housekeeper, to be a better hostess.

GRANDMA’S ADVICE: Slow down and smell that freshly washed cheek of your child, or the new perfume of your teen, or the sweat of your tween who just came home from football practice, or the swamp mud all over the trousers of your7 year old who holds out that frog to kiss.   Those are the moments that pass so quickly that you wish they hadn’t.

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Find something you are grateful for this moment.

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What was it that you thought of right at that moment?  Reply back, I would love to hear from you.

OH-PS–If you have problems with any age kid cleaning their rooms, check out my program, http://KidsClean.biz.  You will be surprised and happy you did=:)

THanks for reading, Sally

I know you have all heard of the program, “Monsters Inside Me”.  And Yuk.  I wish I had never even looked once at that program.  Now, I do find it very interesting, but if I were a MOM now, I would never let my child crawl anywhere, even in the house!!!  I would want him or her to go from the crib to just plain walking and of course you would need him or her wear shoes at all times. Otherwise he could get one of those weird bugs that are dormant for years until the host shows up.

I am sorry to bring this up but I am telling you that I would have a really hard time having my kid do regular kid things.  Moms, it is harder today to be a mom than it was in my day.

Hey, by the way, or BTW, let me tell you about Kids Clean.  Awesome program taking frustration about your kids rooms right out of your  hands and letting the kids take over the  responsibility.  Check it out. http://bit.ly?jLUB8

Parent:    I can’t believe that she just said that. You mean there is hope for me ?There is a way to get my kids rooms clean?

Grandma:    I’m a grandma, trust me on this one.

P:   Well let’s get going, already…

G:  All-righty then…

#1.   The first and most important thing you need… Are you ready for this? I bet any money you will argue with me.

P:   Get going, I don’t have all day. I have to go change the baby.

G:   Ok,   #1. The absolute most important thing all parents need is a SENSE OF HUMOR. Without a sense of humor you are just eating yourself up inside. Without a sense of humor, you are heading for crash and burn, you’re just needing something to complain about.

I am a get- it-done kind of gal, if I have a problem, I want to find the answer and get on with my life, playing, having fun, gardening, going to the beach.  Who can go to the beach with all that ____ piled up in your kids room and in your brain. So dump the ____ and get a sense of humor.  I saw them at Sear’s on sale last week.

P: HMMMM

G:  #2.  The next thing you need is a Bull-Dozer. Now I know you can figure out why you would need a bulldozer.
P:  To bulldoze everything in the room out the window.
G:   Good guess but not quite. You need a bulldozer to keep the kids busy watching while you get in there and start the “Cleaning their room” process.    Trust me on this one too, those kids will sit for hours just watching that bulldozer. You can get some laundry done too : )
P:   HMM, that wouldn’t be so bad. Kinda like the BULLDOZERBABYSITTER.

G: 3. The third thing you will need is a cup of coffee.
P: OK that is enough, why the heck would I need a cup of coffee?
G: Because, the kids are watching the bulldozer, you have plenty of time to get things done, get a cup of coffee and watch the bulldozer with them for a few minutes, take a break.  OH btw, did I tell you that the bulldozer operator is digging a swimming pool in your back yard until you let him know you are ready to have him bulldoze the kid’s room?
P: Yikes!!!! Wait!!! I didn’t…
G: Don’t sweat the small stuff.

G: OK on with # 4.
You will need a camera.
P: FOR WHAT?##$&*#@&&
G: So you can take before pictures of your kids room and after pictures so you can have something to compare it to. OH< yes, take pictures of the bulldozer too because when you and your husband are 80 and sittin’ on the front porch on a warm, sunny day, just a rockin’…, you will both be lookin’ at the pictures and just a laughin’…, even though you don’t have your teeth in yet, just a laughin’ at that time when Junior, who is now the lead scientist at the worlds largest French National Center for Scientific Research, needed his room cleaned and all you could think of was to hire that bulldozer to dig a hole big enough for a swimming pool in the back yard, just so you could have a cup of coffee and watch him keepin’ the kids busy.

lol, lol, lol
P: Hey, that grandma never got to #5. What do you suppose that one was????????

Check the next post down…:)

You ask, plead, cajole, bribe, threaten but do you act  like a mature adult and give consequences if it isn’t done?

Did you know that kids get an average of 70 new toys a year?  Where do all those toys go?  If you have a playroom you are fortunate, if not they are stuffed in every available crevice in your child’s room and probably in the living room, bathroom, your bedroom, the dining room and I be the kitchen has a few too.  There are just too many for Junior’s room.

I know you go in there and clean maybe once every 6 months, maybe more maybe less.  The biggest problem is that Junior has too many toys and couldn’t keep his room clean even if he wanted.  He is totally overwhelmed!!

So give him a little slack.  Get in there and purge what he doesn’t play with any more.  Throw away the broken ones.  Give away the ones that are too young for him.

Cool.  Now that he only has a couple left, I bet he can manage to clean his room.

Do you think your kids can’t clean just because they don’t with you as a parent? Do you think they are not intellectually capable of understanding the word clean?

Do you know that kids get approximately 70 new toys per year?

Then what is the problem?

Did you ever teach them to clean?

Did you ever give them consequences if they didn’t clean?

Were you consistent and did you follow through?

Do you think that is all it takes?

Do you think YOU can do it?

Well they can and you can and that is the beginning of your story.

Check back next week for part 2.

http://kidsclean.biz

It is http://www.8togreat.com

I won’t say anything else but you have to see this website.

I had an eating disorder when I was 12 years old.  I created that to deal with stresses  in my life.  I didn’t know it then but I did need a coping mechanism.  Otherwise the pain was too great to deal with.

I kept this eating disorder around for 30 years.  I did go into “In Patient Treatment” for 3 months, followed by therapy for… well I am still going back for “Tune-ups”, I am 57.

It was only 8 years ago that I stumbled upon Self Talk as a way to prevent myself from over-eating.

Self Talk pops in when I may be considering buying that candy bar.  If I continue to entertain the idea, I will be walking out of the store with the candy bar.  When my “ON PURPOSE” self talk kicks in, I can remind myself that I have a bigger goal in mind and I will walk out of the store empty handed.

So what is SelfTalk?  It is the conversation in our minds that goes on all day long, every day of our lives.  It tells us good things and bad things about ourselves, life, how people feel about us, how we feel about others, when to discipline our kids, whether we yell or whether we are patient. Whether we buy the $500.00 hand bag or whether we go with the more affordable $100.00.

We learn self talk as we grow as kids.  So where is all this going?  Watching my grandkids grow up and watching them receive discipline, I noticed that no one was teaching them about  SELF TALK . No one was explaining to them how to deal with an issue in their minds.  For example: Mom would tell them not to play with Johnny any more because Johnny was a bully. Mom did not tell them how to tell Johnny  they couldn’t play with him or  what to say to themselves when they saw Johnny.  So they might go outside and there was Johnny and they were embarrassed or ashamed and they just let him bully anyway. Haven’t you ever encountered a situation you didn’t know how to deal with?  Think about kids.  They encounter every minute of every day.

If Mom had said,” When you see Johnny, say hi Johnny, we can’t play with you anymore, Sorry.”  And then go somewhere else to play or come back in the house.”  That may be all that is needed.  So the child has some ammunition.  Sometimes you can even rehearse that with your child.

Then we get a little older and there is Johnny again.  OK Jr. has already told Johnny once.  Now he needs to remind himself that ” I still can’t play with Johnny, I will wave, say hello and go to my house to avoid any contact ( that is coached from MOM or DAD.)

Or, we are told to not go to McD’s after schoolbecause we are working on our weight.  The moment arrives, I round the corner , I see McD’s and I have to say to myself, (No, I am not supposed to go to McD’s to eat, I will go home and eat.  I will then ask MOM, when can I go to McD’s the next time because I like it so much?) Again, coached by MOM.

If Mom’s and Dad’s aren’t teaching kids what to say to themselves, then they are making it up based on their experiences. So not only what to say to the kid selling drugs on the corner, but what to say to themselves when they are about to walk past this kid, what words to use in their minds that keeps them on the straight and narrow.

Now parents, I know we have an awful lot of stuff to do in life and with our kids, so you may be saying, when will I have time for all this?

Keep this in mind, had my folks talked to me a little bit about telling myself a certain thing when I wanted to eat, I may have been able to avoid an “Eating Disorder.”

You make time for the things you WANT TO DO!!!!

All content here should be considered as opinion only. Always seek the advice of your doctor regarding your health or the health of your children.